Wait... what?

“I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation,” I said, pointing accusingly at him. He looked down at me from his position on the tree branch.

“Well, we won’t starve,” he said, picking an apple and tossing it to me. I caught it with both hands. It was yellow with little flecks of green, and had a squishy bruise right where my left thumb was.

“That’s not the most pressing issue,” I fumed. “In case you haven’t noticed, I have a hole through my head.” I stuck my arm through it to prove my point. My hand waved up at him from the right side of my head.

“Stop that,” he said, wincing. “Don’t play with yourself in public.” And he dropped a few more apples to the ground. He then did an impressive leap from the branch and landed smartly next to me. I leaned over to whap his shoulder with the hand through my head, which was quite difficult and I only managed to graze his sleeve. My point got across though, and his face did an interesting grimace where one side went up and the other side went down.

“Okay, okay,” he said. “So you bring new meaning to ‘in one ear and out the other.’” I quirked an eyebrow at him and removed the offending arm. I didn’t even have most of my ears left. At least he’d pulled the pipe out.


DON'T ASK QUESTIONS I HAVE NO ANSWERS D8